Preoccupied
by Aeris9919
Summary: Terra contemplates each Titan and the relationship she had with them. Rated for langauge.


Yo! Here is my newest Teen Titan fic. It's about Terra, which is kind of weird because I really don't like her...at all. But all of you should know, that in the comics Terra was so much better. She was all evil which made for a much better story arch. I'm not dissing the show because I love it! I'm just saying read the comics. They rock. Back to the story, it's from Terra's point of view and her thoughts on each Titan. (I was tired of just hearing about her and Beastboy.) Please enjoy.

Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans. DC comics has that honor.

Preoccupied

The Teen Titans: such an interesting group, I mused to myself as I flicked a cigarette butt to the dirt. From the moment I saw them, I despised them. Even from the beginning when they offered me a home and the title Titan I knew it could never be. I had never liked to stay in one place too long; it's been that way since I can remember. I had never had a home, and I had never known love. That was the deciding factor between the Titans and I. Yeah, I'm sure they all had their own sad little story to tell, but I really wasn't interested in hearing about that. Though it would have been fun to nag them about it during a fight. This thought brought a smirk to my face, my hands rummaging for another cigarette. Perhaps if I had tried a bit harder, I could have been a part of their pathetic little team. Who am I kidding? I hated them and their friendship, and all that team unity bullshit was digging on my last nerve. And yet despite my attempts to push them away, I still found them an ever constant burden on my mind. Obsessive? No. Just...preoccupied.

The most interesting thing about the Titans had to be their differences. Even after living with them I am still amazed that they didn't end up ripping one another apart every chance that arose. So different was each Titan from the next, that it was difficult to wrap your mind around the idea of them as a team. My eyes came to rest on the burning paper in my hand, a thin trail of smoke twisting with the wind.

If I had to co-exist with any of the misbegotten group, Cyborg would more than likely be my first choice. But I guess that's not really saying much because I like it best when I don't have to deal with any of those twittering little bugs. The easiest way to describe him is to take any testosteronal idea ever thought and shove it all into one body. Completely obsessed with cars, video game addict, gluttoness eater...not too mention his incessant shouting of 'Boo-yah!' I roll my eyes, taking a drag off my cigarette. And he wanted so desperately to be human. I always had a good laugh with myself about that every now and then. He couldn't just accept his dismal fate, could he? Couldn't just live with the fact that he would be stuck that way, forever. It really was laughable. He was most insufferable when he was trying to play 'Big Brother', like it was his job to take care of us all. I don't need anyone to take care of me. And I especially don't need one of THEM to take care of me. He deserved to have his car smashed to pieces.

One of Cyborg's favorite past times was to tease me about Beastboy. Another reason for me to laugh. To think that I could be romantically linked with such an immature twit.

Beastboy likes to think he's funny. And Beastboy likes to think that people actually listen to him when he blabbers on about tofu. And he loves to think that I care about him. Ha! When I look at the green changeling I see the little brother that you want to lock in a closet. That or perhaps pump full of ridilin. He just never seemed to stop. True, at the beginning I was closer to him than any of the other Titans, but that was before I knew him. Before I knew any of them. Things changed when Robin confirmed my doubt in Beastboy. He had broken his promise, exposing my secret and crushing my chance at a real home. I don't think I can ever forget that. Of course, it was even more amusing when I made my second appearance to the Titans. Beastboy was so enthralled to see me I almost felt a twinge of guilt for lying to him. The key word to remember here is: Almost. I almost cared, but I didn't. Another smile creased my face as I finished off my second cigarette of the night. Most will wonder, if I hated Beastboy so much, why did I try to spare him from the attack on Titan's Tower? And the fact of the matter is, I don't know. My only logical answer is that I was afraid to be alone again. But that's as far as I can take it. Who knew breaking someone's heart could be so much fun? And he would have continued to give me chance after chance if I had let him. I guess he couldn't see how much I was enjoying myself. One drop of evil could not quench the burning inside of me. No. I needed much much more. It was a relief when I finally got rid of him, and I can honestly say I won't miss him at all.

And then there's Raven. Closed off, goth-wannabe, malignant little bookworm. She was the one person who could recognize me for what I truly was. The one person who could break down the trust I had built with each Titan. From the very beginning she was aware of the power she held over me, and didn't waste any time in letting me know that. I made each move with care, and on some days I would avoid her at all costs. Unlike the others, Raven kept a close heel on me and my emotions. But, for the most part, I had her trust, and had gotten her to believe that I was her friend. Our battle still played vividly in my mind, exciting every one of my senses. My voice had been as sweet as sugar as I mocked Raven, picking and pulling at her one true weakness. (The one time Beastboy had come in handy was when he explained to me about the other Titans.) A part of me was afraid when I saw the power of the Goth's anger, but that quickly subsided. Slade's voice in my ear reminded me of the ultimate goal. Closing my eyes, I remembered the laugh that licked at my lips as I watched the once mighty Titan drown in that sea of mud. It was invigorating.

But nothing could match the laughter that erupted from me as had I watched the Tamaranian princess fall to the jagged rocks below. And hearing Robin scream her name only elicited more laughter. Starfire was easier to fool, even more so than Beastboy. That was painfully obvious just by the way she acted, but hearing about her wayward relationship with her sister only confirmed my assumptions. She was so ignorant to the ways of earth that I just couldn't help but take advantage of her. I would spend hours leading her in a circle of endless questions, pretending to not understand what she was trying to ask. I think Robin was on to my little game, because he would quickly come to her rescue, giving the answer to her question. This is when I would kindly excuse myself, rolling my eyes and suppressing a gag. So you have to imagine my delight when I got to fight the Tamaran, my true colors crushing her spirit right before my eyes. She was strong, unbelievably so. But all I had to do was play dead and she was mine. But it was even more fun to destroy her all together. I had been aiming for the boy wonder, but the noble girl pushed herself into dangers way, saving her friend from a watery grave. Damn her for ruining my fun.

But then again, it seemed like fate had deemed Robin and I to be the last two standing in battle. Former apprentice versus new apprentice.

Oh Robin. It was easy to see why Starfire liked him so much. I had caught him plenty of times in the training room, nothing but a pair of black sweats and a pair of sneakers to aid him in his workout, sweat dripping off his well-toned form. He had the body of a gymnast with the strength of a body builder, something any girl would take time to appreciate. He, like Raven, guarded his emotions with a vengeance. Not even Starfire could have gotten a word from Robin when it came to his past. But there really was no need to dig for the Titan leader's weakness. Slade had discovered a long time ago that the way to the boy wonder's heart was his pathetic little friends. Which is why I couldn't help but laugh as he watched his little girl friend fall off that cliff, and I just had to bring up the loss of his teammates as we fought. Robin must have been expecting this because his retort was just as clever, and even more enraging. How dare he imply that those bastards were ever my friends! And then he tells me that I can be saved. Saved from what? From being who I want to be? From destroying him? From evil? Just because he made the stupid choice didn't mean I had to too. It was a sweet relief when I finally pushed him underground with the others. Good riddance.

Starting a third cigarette, I turned and kicked my way down a path, succumbing to the cool air of night. Life would change tomorrow. The Teen Titans were gone for good. So, why are my thoughts still lingering with them? I guess I'm just preoccupied.

Fin

Thanks for reading and please please review. And be sure to look out for my next fic this weekend. It's about Robin's perspective on Terra.

And thanks again to Rizu for the grammar check. She's so great! XD


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